Tag: Solid Snake

McDonald’s is the Place to Rip

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???

Hi, what can I get for you today?

Metal Ajit Pai

Hello! I would like one supersized Reese’s Cup McFlurry.

???

I’m sorry sir, we don’t sell Reese’s McFlurries.

Metal Ajit Pai

What? But I bought one here last week!

???

I’m sorry but it’s not something we serve.

Metal Ajit Pai

This is nutrageous! Get me your manager!

???

Yes sir.

*Moments later, an explosion can be heard.*
???

ice cream machine broke

Metal Ajit Pai

Understandable, have a good day.

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Masks

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*The Gaylord Hotel’s night bar. Snake is at the bar, alone, drinking a beer.*
???

I’ve been for some time
Looking for someone
I need to know how
Please tell me who I am…

*Thomas sits next to Snake.*
Thomas Bangalter

Hello there. Mind if I sit here?

Solid Snake

Make yourself at home.

Thomas Bangalter

Good, good. What’s in this selection of wines… “1999 Château Backstab”? Never heard of it. Seems like a knockoff trying to sound French, but I can try at least. Garçon, could you please give me a glass?

Buffet!

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Dinner Under Pressure

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*The dining hall.*
Solid Snake

…what is this?

Pitbull

Creepy pasta!

Eminem

What’s with the spooky theme? Is it fuckin’ Halloween now or somethin’?

Elmo

No, silly! It’s pasta day!

Jack Black

Hey, watch your language…

Elmo

Huh? Silly isn’t a bad word, Mr. Black!

Jack Black

…You’re right Elmo, my bad! Silly is an okay word to use… unlike some other words…

Eminem

…

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How To Cheer up a Snake

News » Interviews Posted on

*Outside. It’s night. It’s cold.*
Don-chan

Look! There he is, da-don! Mr. Snake!

Hakuko

And he’s alone…

Don-chan

Yuck! What’s that smell?

Hakuko

He’s smoking a cigarette. It’s a grown up thing, don’t worry about it.

Don-chan

Smells nasty, da-don… he must not be very happy if he’s doing something that smells so yucky…

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The Yappy Tournament’s Paragons of Magnificent Virtuoso

News » Interviews Posted on


*The cafe, quite busy. Jack & Elmo are sitting at a table, training. A big shadow approaches them.*
Elmo

Ho ho ho, ho ho ho, stop, stop, stop!

Jack Black

You got a nice rhythm going there, little buddy!

Dr. Robotnik

Ohhhh, look who’s there thinking they’re the new hot sensation in town.

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A Reluctant Duel – Snake and Rhythm Masters Reinterview

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Unregistered HyperCam 2

hello evry1, welcomm to anthr iintervww; hey uhh, wat abut teh drum

Don-chan

*sneezes*

Unregistered HyperCam 2

ey drum wak up grab abrushh n put a lil wak up

Don-chan

*sneezes*

Unregistered HyperCam 2

w8 snak did u put im to slep lik alll teh others

Solid Snake

Are you kidding me? There’s no way I could put this kid to sleep with a neck as big as his… if he even has a neck.

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How to Cheer Up a Drum

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*The scene is the studio’s stage in the middle of the night. Faint drumming sounds in rhythmic patterns. A green light appears backstage.*
Solid Snake

*into his codec* Target has been localized. Come as soon as possible, I don’t want to have to deal with this myself… What? You want me to go talk to him? You do realize my strong point is to spy on people, not to… Hrngh… Fine, but please come quickly.

*Snake gets out of his box and approaches the drumming.*
Don-chan

*suddenly stops* I-is someone there?

Continue reading “How to Cheer Up a Drum”